‘Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey’ Movie Review: Neither Charm Nor Sense, Just A slasher Movie!

Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023)
Veronica Loop
Veronica Loop

Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey is a slasher movie written and directed by Rhys Frake-Waterfield, starring Craig David Dowsett and Chris Cordell. The story is inspired by Winnie-the-Pooh books A. A. Milne and E. H. Shepard.

A standard slasher about a children’s classic that only makes you think: how did they get the licenses?

Looking for a stupid movie about girls in bathing suits who end up with their heads crushed? We defend each person’s freedom of choice, you can make up your own minds about it.

But beware, don’t fall in love with the main characters, because each of them barely last five minutes.

The photography is not bad.

Movie Review

A kind of mixture between The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Friday the 13th, so you can imagine how original – with what is considered to be  original-  it is and how it is going to change your life… not. It’s rather more something that can be described as a bit stupid and, except for the beginning with the animations and some sequences…, a ‘next to nothing’, especially in terms of the script, which they don’t bother with at all.

The film begins with a boy who, obsessed, takes his girlfriend (some are lucky) to a dark forest to look for his childhood teddy bear. Of course, the girl ends up as she ends up (ground up – quite literally – in a machine). And the whole “thing” goes on like that, without any irony and scarcely a couple of jokes that end up somewhat lost in a movie with absolutely no plot development and that has about ten sequences of “carnage” and the rest, it’s filler in the shape of… ‘I’m pretty and in a bathing suit and I’m bathing in a jacuzzi in the middle of a forest (just see how convenient that all is) and, hey… look how the whole thing ends! With my head bust.’

Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey is a whole succession of unpleasant scenes of that kind which have made slasher movies so instantly recognizable and that, consumed in drive-in theaters, fulfilled their role of serving teenagers who had the desire to get closer to each other having the perfect excuse to, do precisely that – get closer (a little bit more).

It’s spring, you know. And although there are few drive-in theaters left, streaming also has that same magic.

The cinematography isn’t bad, some moments here and there in the soundtrack stand on their own two feet, and even some decent actors (Kevin Bacon) came out of Friday the 13th.

Unfunny, one brutal atrocity after another.

Variety said it was a movie whose goal was to ruin your childhood memories: it’s not that big a deal either, though. The character will remain intact because this movie – unfortunately for its makers – isn’t destined for greatness, to say the least. The naive little bear will still be there, with his spirit intact.

Cast


Craig David Dowsett / Pooh Bear
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Chris Cordell / Piglet

Amber Doig-Thorne / Alice
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Maria Taylor / Maria

Movie Trailer

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